Hannibal Buress Thief Story Square
Hannibal Buress Thief Story Square

Hannibal Buress Reveals The Perfect Way To Get Modern Revenge On A Thief

Lenny Kravitz, Grace Jones, Lauryn Hill, Lion Babe, Thundercat, SZA & More Rock The Afropunk Festival 2015 in Brooklyn, NY.

"You ever have someone steal something from you, and then you catch them and then they act like they weren't stealing?" Hannibal Buress poses this eternal, burning question in a new clip taken from his Comedy Central show Why?, a program that's quickly become the must-watch (or must scope out on the internet the next day) show of the summer. Buress describes a recent moment when a fairly hapless criminal walked off with his laptop bag, only to get caught up in a text message conversation with his comedian victim over the attempted techno-robbery. It did not end well for the guy.

As the clip rolls, we're treated to a dramatic reading of that conversation. "Like I said, your stuff is ALL GUCCI. No worries," the theif told Buress, who was mighty bemused by the tone and slang. "You ruined one of my days, I'll ruin 30 of yours," the host replied. How he would have done that, we're not sure (and neither is Hannibal).

Buress's initial goal, it turns out, had been to get the guy to actually appear on Why? for an on-camera beratement. That never happened, but at least we got a chance to relish in the story. Watch the clip below (and watch a new episode of Why? tonight at 10:30 EST).