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The Wu-Tang Clan Gave Bill Murray Permission To Steal Their New $2 Million LP

Bill Murray Wu Tang Clan heist

UPDATE:It turns out that it really is too good to be true. Multiple reports are pouring in that the supposed contract image is a hoax. Bill Murray is almost certainly not written into a specific contract regarding the legal theft of a top-secret rap album owned by an asshole. We're now going to give up blogging and go hunt that Jaguar Shark.

Once Upon A Time In Shaolin is the hip-hop mystery that just refuses to die, and now, after yesterday's depressing news that the one-of-a-kind Wu-Tang Clan album was sold to a man who's the human equivalent of a flaming heap of garbage, a beacon of hope has appeared on the horizon. And that beacon is Bill Murray.

Multiple outlets are reporting on a very unorthodox clause written into the sellers contract between The Wu-Tang Clan and Martin Shkreli, who purchased the album back in May for $2 million. Shkreli made news earlier this year after he purchased a life-saving pharmaceutical drug, only to raise its price by 5550%, and suffice to say that many (us included) were disappointed to learn that he's the guy who owns the only evidence of this chapter in Wu-Tang history. What's more, the album can't be released to the public for another 88 years. However, according to a legal contract, "The buying party [Shkreli] also agrees that at any time during the stipulated 88 year period, the seller may legally plan and attempt to execute one (1) heist or caper to steal back Once Upon A Time In Shaolin, which, if successful, would return all ownership rights to the seller."

It goes on to read: "Said heist or caper can only be undertaken by currently active members of the Wu-Tang Clan and/or actor Bill Murray, with no legal repercussions."

Yes. Hells yes. You're reading that right. Bill Murray has specific legal permission to attempt to steal Once Upon A Time In Shaolin, heist-style, from Martin Shkreli. If he so chooses, he can even call in RZA, GZA, Ghostface Killah and the entire Wu-Tang Clan to be his entourage. The world might be coming apart at the seams, but the thought of Steve Zissou/Peter Venkman/Carl Spackler pulling a crime caper in the name of hip-hop justice sure does warm our heart.

(And if this all turns out to be a hoax, we're going to give up on everything and just go chase after the Jaguar Shark.)